Divorce is never easy, especially when children are involved, but one of the most challenging aspects of co-parenting after divorce is creating a holiday parenting schedule.
Holidays are supposed to be fun and relaxing, but for divorced parents, they can be a source of stress and conflict without a clear understanding of what you can and cannot do.
In Texas, most judges will use some form of the standard possession order, which comes with a variety of options for dealing with the holidays after divorce depending on how far apart you and your former spouse live.
If you are not yet divorced, and no custody agreement is in place, your holiday parenting schedule is entirely up to you and your spouse. However, if you are not able to agree on a holiday parenting schedule, you may need to seek a temporary custody order.
Keep in mind that, without any order in place, the state has no legal method to force a parent to give another parent access to their child. You must have a court order signed by a judge for the police or any other governmental agency to even consider taking action.
Understanding the Standard Possession Order and Holiday Parenting Schedules
In Texas, the Standard Possession Order (SPO) is the default parenting schedule used by the courts to determine how much time each parent spends with their child. Essentially, “parenting time” is time when you have access to and possession of your child—it may also be called visitation.
The SPO outlines the basic holiday parenting schedule for some major U.S. holidays, including:
- Thanksgiving
- Christmas Break
- Spring Vacation (Spring Break)
- Mother’s Day
- Father’s Day
The SPO is broken into 3 major categories defined by the physical distance between your home and your spouse or former spouse’s home:
Each version of the SPO also includes two options that, in most cases, the noncustodial parent is allowed to pick between: the “default” option and the “election” option.
(The noncustodial parent is the parent who does not have what is usually thought of as “full custody,” known as the “possessory conservator” in Texas. The parent with “full custody” is the custodial parent or the “managing conservator.”)
It is important to note that the SPO is just a starting point, and the judge who presides over your case can make or allow changes outside of these options. They can also bar the noncustodial parent from choosing an option (or modify their choice) if they believe that choice is not in the child’s best interest.
That being said, Texas courts prefer not to make choices for parents and would rather parents come to an agreement on their own. In Texas, courts believe that children thrive best when parents, regardless of their marital status, co-parent amicably. Essentially, they do not wish to tell parents how to parent their children if they do not have to.
Parents can and should work together to create a holiday parenting schedule that meets their family’s unique needs. The SPO provides a framework for ensuring that both parents have the opportunity to spend quality time with their children during the holidays, but it may not be the best fit for every family.
You and your spouse are also legally allowed to agree to a completely different holiday parenting schedule if you both choose to do so, regardless of any court order that is in place. However, if either party disagrees with a change, you are bound to abide by the court-ordered holiday parenting schedule, and that order can be enforced.
If your divorce is not yet completed, you may not have a custody order in place, and you may need to request a temporary custody order from the judge presiding over your case.
Temporary Custody Orders | Managing the Holidays During Divorce
A temporary custody order in Texas is a court order that outlines the custody and visitation arrangements for children during the pendency of a divorce or child custody case.
It is designed to provide stability and structure for the children while the case is ongoing and before a final custody order is issued.
Either parent can request a temporary custody order by filing a motion with the court. This is typically done at the beginning of a divorce or child custody case. You will likely want your attorney to handle this for you as requesting a temporary order can be highly complex and difficult to understand and file.
The court will then schedule a hearing to address the request for a temporary order. At the hearing, both parents will have the opportunity to present evidence and argue their case for custody and visitation.
The court will make a determination based on the best interests of the child. This may include factors such as the child’s relationship with each parent, the ability of each parent to provide for the child’s needs, and any history of abuse, neglect, addiction, criminal activity, or other factors.
The temporary order will outline which parent has primary custody of the child as well as any holiday parenting schedules for the non-custodial parent. The order may also address issues such as child support, health insurance, and decision-making authority.
The temporary custody order will remain in effect until a final custody order is issued or the case is resolved. The terms of the temporary order can be modified by the court if circumstances change during the case.
While temporary custody orders are obviously not permanent, they can set a precedent for the final order and provide important protections for your children during a potentially turbulent time.
Traveling During the Holidays After Divorce
If you do not have a court order in place, temporary or permanent, then both you and your spouse or ex-spouse can take your child anywhere during the holidays, including out of the country, for any amount of time.
If you plan to travel with your children during the holidays and you have a court order in place, make sure to follow it carefully. Your order may specify when and how holiday travel can take place. If you are unsure about the terms of your order, consult with your family law attorney for guidance.
If your court order requires you to provide notice to the other parent before traveling, make sure to do so in writing and within the specified timeframe. This can help avoid misunderstandings and potential legal issues.
If you plan to travel internationally with your children, it is a good idea to get written consent from the other parent, even if your court order does not require it. This can help avoid complications and misunderstandings.
You may also want to let your co-parent know your travel plans, including your itinerary and contact information. This can help alleviate concerns and reduce conflict. You might also consider providing your co-parent with regular updates during your trip. This can make it much easier to handle the holidays after divorce.
Get Help with Temporary or Permanent Custody Orders
Dealing with the holidays after divorce can be difficult, but we are here to help.
If you need help getting a temporary or permanent custody order put in place, we can help. Contact us today to set up your initial consultation or call us directly at (214) 646-3253.
